


Wide Eyes

by MadamPuddifoot9



Category: Shadowhunters (TV)
Genre: Boys In Love, Breakup, Eventual Happy Ending, Freeform, Hiatus fic, High Warlock of Brooklyn Magnus Bane, Lust, M/M, Makeup Sex, Making Up, Malec breakup, Malec fic, Mutual Pining, Post 2x20, Shadowhunters - Freeform, Unresolved Sexual Tension, alternative ending to 2x20, head of the new work institute, post breakup, problem solving, sh fic, shadowhunters tv - Freeform
Language: English
Status: In-Progress
Published: 2018-01-11
Updated: 2018-01-11
Packaged: 2019-03-03 13:19:18
Rating: Explicit
Warnings: Creator Chose Not To Use Archive Warnings
Chapters: 3
Words: 4,023
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/13342068
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/MadamPuddifoot9/pseuds/MadamPuddifoot9
Summary: What if Magus hadn’t talked to Alec at the end of 2x20?They didn’t get back together. But can they stay away from each other?





	1. Chapter 1

It had been over a month now since Magnus had called time on their relationship due to Alec’s knowledge of the missing soul sword. It had been torture at first, and Magnus knew he’d made the wrong decision the night Valentine died. Alec had approached him and asked for a minute of his time to talk and Magnus had told him no. He told him he had to meet with the Warlock Council and discuss events. It was a lie but he simply hadn’t been ready to admit this own part in the breakdown of their relationship. Instead he went out back and opened a portal to his loft.  
In the following days Alec had stoped texting. He emailed once about a meeting for the leaders at the institute but it had clearly been a mass email. It seemed Alec was able to get a grip on his emotions and move on so Magnus, being the stubborn mule he was, tried to do the same.  
He gathered all Alec’s belongings up and set them in boxes. He sent them to the institute with a wave of his hand. Soon the loft was just his again. It seemed so empty, it wasn’t as if Alec kept much there apart from clothes and a few books but still the loft felt cold and empty now his possessions had been returned. He expected a thank you text from Alec. He didn’t get one.

The first time they met again was at the institute. He entered the room with Raphael beside him, Alec had welcomed them to the table where Luke and Meliorn were already situated.  
They discussed the clave, downworlder business and life post war. Alec caught his eye a few times while everyone had their say but he mostly seemed to talk to the others.  
When the meeting was over Magnus had hung around the corridor waiting for Raphael to be done talking to Isabelle, Alec had approached him.  
“By the way thank you for returning my stuff.” Alec said as he strode closer.  
Magnus inclined his head “no problem.” He couldn’t think what else to say to Alec now. Usually he could talk to Alec from dusk until dawn but now he had nothing to say. (Except I miss you. And he wasn’t ready to say that yet.) 

Alec turned to leave and then hesitated. He held his hand up like he was unsure before he spoke. “Magnus.... do you have- do you know where my green sweater is? I think I left it at yours, it wasn’t in the boxes.”  
Magnus pretended to think and hoped his cheeks weren’t flushed. He was sleeping with Alec’s sweater under his pillow.  
“No.” He said after a moment. “I don’t think I’ve seen it.”  
Alec looked at him oddly for a moment and Magnus was sure  
Alex knew he was lying but wasn’t sure why.  
“Okay. Well if you find it...”  
“I will surely return it to its rightful owner immediately.”  
Alec motioned his head “well thank you for taking the time. I have paperwork waiting for me.” Again he inclined his head this time as a farewell and he walked off leaving Magnus alone. 

Magnus watched him walk away hoping he would stop again, hoping he would look back but Alec simply walked away with his back straight and head set. 

 

A few days later Magnus was nursing a whiskey while he complained to his oldest friend.

“I miss him. I miss him so much!” Magnus moaned loudly.

“Oh hush.” Caterina clipped “you’ll wake Madzie.”

Magnus rolled his eyes and took another drink. “Do you think he misses me? I mean, he just walked away the other day, not even a glance over his shoulder.”

“Where was he going?” Caterina asked as she folded clothes from a basket. 

“He said he had paperwork.” Magnus replied

Caterina looked up from the yellow dress she was folding. “Maybe He was you know... off to do his paperwork.”

Magnus glared at her “you know exactly what I mean.” Caterina wasn’t talking his heartbreak seriously enough. He waved his hand and the laundry she was folding sprang into neat piles. This time Catherine glared at him.

“Look now you’re done. Have a drink with me.” Magnus shrugged. 

“I’m on earlies.” Caterina reminded him “plus I don’t want a drink.”

Magnus sighed. “Can we get back to my broken heart again now?” 

“Ever the dramatic.” Caterina said as she crossed her arms. 

Magnus tutted at her. “I’m serious, Cat. I’m three days away from joining a monastery.”

Caterina snorted. “Not again. Remember last time?”

“Stop laughing!” Magnus said 

“Magnus. Do you want him back?” Caterina said 

Magnus consisted this for all of one second.

“Yes.” He admitted. “These last weeks have been... the worst.”

“Then talk to him!” Caterina said 

“I can’t.” Magnus said “I don’t think I can.”

“Why?” 

“I just can’t bring myself to do it.” Magnus said

“You can’t forgive him.” Caterina said simply. “Not that any of us should.” She muttered quietly but Magnus caught it.

“He only just found out about the soul sword before I did.” Magnus said defending him. “He wanted to stop an uprising, save lives...”

“It sounds like you’ve already forgiven him.” Caterina replied with a knowing look.

Magnus turned his glass on his hands. “I know why he did it. I don’t agree with him, I don’t... but, I understand. What I’m having trouble with is that he lied to me.”

“After Camille you clearly have issues with trust and liars. It’s natural.” Caterina said “the thing is Magnus, you don’t seem like you did before with Camille, the decade of mental breakdown and loathing. You seem... a little more annoying than usual but you’re coping fine without him. Yet you claim you’ve never loved anyone, man, woman... any person the way you loved the Shadowhunter.” 

Magnus finished his drink as he pondered her words. He knew exactly what she meant. 

“You’re saying nothing?” Caterina teased “finally I’ve shut you up?”

Magnus shrugged. 

“Do you know why you’re still up and living? Why you’re not 3 bottles deep in a back alleyway? Because you know you haven’t given up on him. You told me how it ended. He said he loved you, you said you loved him. No ones feelings have changed, it almost makes it worse. Neither of you can move on. Without each other but neither of you are falling apart because deep down you both have hope. Have I cleared this up yet? Can I please go to bed?” 

Magnus stood up and passed her his empty glass.

“You’re not wrong.” Magnus opened his portal. “Good night, darling.”

Just before Magnus stepped in he heard her voice behind him. “Just Talk to him.”


	2. Chapter 2

Magnus entered the Hunter’s Moon as quickly as he could not wanting to let the heat inside seep out into the frosty night. He headed straight to the the bar bypassing the seelies at one end and the few wolves that sat on the bar stools. As luck had it his favourite bar tender was working.

“Hey!” Maia smiled brightly then with an amused tone “imagine seeing you here.” 

Magnus smiled, he didn’t come here that often did he? He hadn’t been back since the victory party. 

“Hello, I’ll have my usual.” Magnus stated. He unwrapped his scarf a little as he began to feel the heat. “Long day.” He added.

“Oh yeah?” Maia commented as she pulled down a martini glass “just come for a debriefing of the day?” 

Magnus watched her fill the glass. “Only because you listen so well my dear.” Magnus smirked.

“Oh not me.” Maia smiled, she motioned over his shoulder and Magnus turned his head to see Alec sitting at a small table with his back to him.

“Alexander.” Magnus said quietly in surprise. “How long has he been here?”

“Oh don’t worry. You’re not late I’d say he’s been here ten minutes at most.” Maia said as he pushed his drink towards him. 

Magnus held out the money “we didn’t plan to meet.” Magnus said gently. 

“Oh. That’s just good luck then.” Maia said as she wiped down the bar. 

Luck. Magnus thought. Or fate. “We always seem to find our way back to each other.” He remembered Alec’s words. 

Suddenly Magnus had a thought. It wasn’t like Alec to be out drinking alone, what if he was on a date? 

Magnus lifted his drink and thanked Maia. He walked towards Alec who was hunched over a bunch of papers, pen in hand. He didn’t seem to hear Magnus approach. He lifted a bottle of beer and took a drink as he reread what he had just scribbled down.  
Magnus body tingled as he caught a hint of that classic Alec smell. He closed his eyes and savoured it before he took a deep breath 

“Of all the gin joints...” Magnus said aloud 

He saw Alec startle a little and whip around.

“Magnus.” He breathed out. His face turned a little red.

“May I?” Magnus said as he sat down opposite Alec who still looked like he was in shock. “Unless you rather I sat somewhere else?”

“What?” Alec said “no, no... I was just... never mind. It’s fine.”

Magnus heart sank a little “Are you waiting on someone? A date maybe?” 

He kept his tone light but his stomach was in knots awaiting Alec’s answer.

“A date?” Alec repeated “Magnus, come on.”

Magnus set his glass down. Relief swept over him. 

“You’re an extremely handsome man, I’ve told you enough times, any man would be lucky to be on a date with you.” Magnus replied 

“I’m not sure I’d be such great company right now.” Alec countered. 

“Let’s see.” Magnus teased “handsome- already checked.” He held out one finger. “Sexy? Check, check, I’m giving you two fingers for that one.” He gave Alec a tiny wink at the innuendo “powerful Shadowhunter? Check. Head of the NY institute? Check. Kind, caring, considerate? Check, check, check” Magnus was running out of fingers “good at pool? Well you miss out on that one...” 

Alec laughed at that. He was so beautiful, Magnus yearned to reach out and touch him. 

“I’m good at pool, you cheat!” Alec countered, his eyes twinkled now with the easy banter. 

Magnus was affronted “Alexander! How dare you! I am the high Warlock of Brooklyn, an extremely skilled-“

“-cheater.” Alec cut in. “And to answer your absurd question, no, I’m not on a date.”

“Okay, Good.” Magnus replied “I mean, fine.” He picked up his drink and took a sip hoping Alec didn’t notice.

Alec shuffled his paperwork and then placed them and the pen into a backpack. 

“I should go.” 

Magnus almost chocked on his drink. “No, don’t. How about a game of pool?”

Alec looked torn. “Any cheating?”

“I don’t cheat.” Magnus insisted “but you have my word, Shadowhunter. Please, stay.”

Alec nodded quickly and Magnus jumped up and let the way. He rushed ahead of Alec who was gathering up his belongings and approached the two men playing at the table. 

“Game’s over. Leave.” He flashed his eyes and they obediently left right away, not wanting to test his patience tonight.

Alec followed a moment later with his beer. Magnus handed him his cue. “Care to break?” He asked 

Alec snorted “already have.” He said bitterly, quietly, but Magnus heard. 

Alec broke the balls and they began to play. 

He loved watching Alec play, the concentration on his face, the way he slinked around the table looking for the best position to play. Plus it was a great opportunity to view his delicious ass when he bent over the table. 

“I think you’re letting me win.” Alec said half way through.

Magnus jumped from his improper thoughts about Alec’s backside at once. “Sorry, I’m just distracted.”

“What’s up?” Alec asked “bad day?” 

“No, not that. Do you wanna go outside a moment?” Magnus blurted out loud.

Alec narrowed his eyes “what about the game?”

“Please?”

Alec shrugged and set his cue atop of the table and walked to the back exit without another word.

Magnus drained his drink and then followed. 

The cold air whipped Magnus in the face as soon as he exited behind Alec, he ignored it.

“What’s wrong?” 

Before he could even begin to answer that obvious question he had pushed Alec back, back, back into the rough alley wall.

A second later he surged forward and kissed him hard. It took Alec a shocked second to catch on before he kissed back in equal measure. A moan escaping from his throat. 

Before long they were a panting mess, sucking and kissing, tongues duelling and hands tugging on hair.  
Magnus revelled in it, the taste of Alec and the raw passion.  
His hands just fell onto Alec’s belt when Alec pushed him back.

“What are you doing?” Alec said

“I want you, you haven’t guessed?” Magnus said 

“I got it.” Alec replied “but we’re not together anymore, are we?” He looked at Magnus was begging eyes, desperately hoping.

“No.” Magnus said slowly “but.... but that doesn’t mean we can’t have a little fun?”

Alec stepped away from him and Magnus sighed. He’d really blown this. Big time. He was an idiot.

“I need time to consider.” Alec said and Magnus looked up at him 

“Okay. How long?” He asked, he needed those lips back on his pronto.

“Goodnight, Magnus.” Alec said and he walked back towards the door.

Magnus stood in the cold night air and regained his normal breathing. He hoped Alec would accept his offer and fast. He really couldn’t go on much longer like this


	3. Chapter 3

Magnus groaned and crawled out of bed. Who or what was at his door at 6.30am? His wards shook as he shuffled from his bedroom in his silk pyjamas.  
As he got to the living room he flicked his wrist and dressed himself, complete with hair and makeup. No one got to see him like a slob, well except maybe Alexander. Magnus groaned at the thought of the previous night as he made his way to the loft door.  
Taking a steadying breath and shaking Alec from his head Magnus opened the door, ready for whatever disaster or downworld emergency that came calling today.

Magnus’ heart stuttered when he found a nervous looking Shadowhunter outside.

“Alexander!” Magnus ran a hand through his hair nervously and stepped back to let him in.  
Alec strode through the door but lingered near the doorway, clearly he wasn’t staying.

Magnus pushed the door closed and turned to face him.   
“Let me guess? New York is in mortal peril yet again. It better be good to have me awake at this ungodly hour, A greater demon at least. Do you want a coffee?” Magnus summoned them both a hot drink, he watched Alec startled as the cup appeared in his hand.

“There’s no emergency.” Alec said looking into his cup.

 

“Ah.” Magnus said as he walked past Alec and made his way into the living area. “That must mean you’re here to tell me what a despicable human being I am. Well, minus the human part of course.” He took a drag of coffee as he finished his sentence.

“I’m... what?” Alec said in confusion. “No, I’m not, I just need to talk to you.”

“Well then.” Magnus said sitting down on the couch. He motioned to Alec to sit on the other. 

Alec set his coffee down on the table and perched on the very edge of the seat. “Last night, what you said outside-“

Magnus sighed and closed his eyes for a second. “-let me go first.” Magnus cut in and he saw Alec’s eyes narrow. “What I said to you. It was wrong. I barely slept all night thinking it over.”

“You and me both.” Alec muttered.

“I sincerely apologise, Alexander. I should never, ever have said that to you. It cheapened everything we had with one desperate suggestion. I was in despair, it was a shock to see you out alone, and I know I have no business saying it but I was jealous, I was hurt even thinking that you were meeting someone else. You can of course do whatever you want now we’re apart but I can’t help myself when I’m around you. My coherent thoughts seem to leave me.”   
Magnus also set his cup aside and he sighed waiting for Alec to respond.

“I love you, Magnus.” Alec said and Magnus’ heart broke into pieces “I’m effected being around you too, it’s so hard I can barely cope. I’ve been in the bar every night this week just hoping you’d drop in. I was waiting for you, Magnus; no one else.”  
Magnus nodded, his eyes glazed.

“But what you said about us being casual...” 

“Please, don’t even dwell on it. I was so wrong...”

“I know.” Alec said as he wrapped his arms around his middle, holding himself together. “All night all I could think of was no. No, I can’t do it, I can’t just be casual with you. It’s not who I am.”

“I know that. I do.” Magnus pleaded “I know your values Alexander. Like I said I was just desperate to be near you. To be with you anyway you’d have me.”

“You know the way I want you.” Alec said desperately “I’ll always want you Magnus, I don’t think I know any other way and I don’t want to! But I needed you to know that it won’t be like that ever. I’m worth more than that and you are too.”

“You are worth more than everything in the world, Alexander. Please believe that, I love you so much.” Magnus said as he stared Alec in the eye and Alec looked like he was refraining from shaking. His eyes as red as his own.

“Then why are we doing this to each other?” Alec asked desperately and a tear escaped from his eye.

Magnus got up and went to him then, sitting close and taking his hand tightly in his own.

“Why aren’t we back together?” Alec asked weakly and Magnus wanted to hold him and protect him from every ounce of pain he felt but he couldn’t, not yet.

“It’s because of the soul sword.” Alec stated and Magnus began to shake his head “because I lied to you.” 

“Don’t apologise. I understand now, why you kept it from me. It’s my own insecurities that are ruining this. I have an issue with trust. Camille, she left me so broken, damaged. I’m still trying to learn how to trust anyone again.”

Alec wiped his eye with his free hand and then squeezed Magnus’ hand that was around his. “I’m truly sorry. I’m still learning about relationships too. I honestly thought I was doing the right thing at the time and I would never ever make that mistake again. You have my word.”   
Magnus reached out and cupped Alec’s face, his heart melting as Alec relaxed into his touch and looked visibly happier.

“I want you. I want us. More than anything.” Magnus said 

“But?” Alec guessed 

“But I think we need to slow things down a little.” Magnus said.

“Anything.” Alec said eagerly 

Magnus smiled weakly “what we have is so intense, and that’s amazing because I love you so much it makes me mad; but if we want to get it right this time we should slow it down, maybe?”

Alec nodded “Okay. We can do that. I’ll not stay over, uh... we can spend less time together, be less dependent?”

“Right.” Magnus agreed even though his entire body was screaming the opposite. “We can control ourselves. Be more... be less effected by each other until we settle back into this relationship.”

“I agree.” Alec said nodding. His tongue moistening his bottom lip. “We could have a second first date.”

“Yeah...” Magnus said slowly as his eyes flickered from Alec’s gorgeous big eyes to his lips. “I’d like that.”  
Was Alec moving forward? Was he?   
“I’d like that a lot.” He said as his eyes flutter shut in time as their lips pressed together.  
Magnus held Alec’s jaw in his grip as he kissed him with everything he had, he moaned as Alec’s tongue ran along his lip. He opened up for him immediately and savoured the sensations that flooded his body.   
Alec was tugging at the hem of his shirt as they dragged each other up.   
Alec pulling it off with eager hands as he pushed Magnus backwards towards the bedroom.

The bed was still unmade from his sudden awakening, and Alec was pulling off his boots, they laughed and kissed as they quickly rid themselves of their clothes. 

“Wait, Wait.” Magnus said finally “what are we doing?” He rubbed his nose gently with Alec’s, gripping his neck with his ringed fingers. 

“I know.” Alex said and he rested his palm over Magnus’ heart. “I just missed you so much.”

“Me too, darling.” Magnus nodded as he panted “we just need each other first, right?”

“Right.” Alec nodded “I have to be at the institute for nine. I have a briefing so we can start then... I’ll go and then we can start?”

Magnus grinned and surged forward again kissing Alec and pushing him down onto the bed. They fell as gracefully as ever and and Magnus caressed Alec’s face as they kissed. Holding him like the most precious thing in the world. And he was right.   
Alec pushed himself up into a sitting position with Magnus straddling his lap. His cock was hard and ready, Alec’s thick and heavy against his flat stomach. Using his Shadowhunter skills Alec flipped them over so Magnus was spread into the pillows now. He pushed Magnus’ legs wide and settled there. Magnus was more than happy for Alec to take control. To set the boundaries and take charge.   
Alec retrieved the bottle of lube from the bed drawer and he got Magnus hot and ready as he kissed his body from top to bottom.   
Magnus was squirming in pleasure under him when Alec asked if he was ready.  
“Always. For you.” Magnus moaned as Alec pushed into him to the very hilt.  
They kissed and clung to each other as they rocked and thrust. Both whispering desperate pleas into the others ears and Alec pushed Magnus’ arms above his head and threaded their fingers together.  
There was nothing else to call it but desperate love making. Worshipping.   
But it felt right, it felt Perfect and they came hard together with each other’s names on their tongue.

 

A while later they lay in recovery, Magnus’ head resting on Alec’s bicep. He’d already cleaned them up with his magic.

“What are you thinking?” Magnus murmured 

“That I should probably go back to the institute.” Alec replied honestly.

Magnus smiled but snuggled closer, his face rolling into the warmth of Alec’s neck. “Stay.” He whispered.

“I think we’ve already pushed the limits of this new start.” Alec said as he rubbed Magnus’ arm.

“I know.” Magnus said in defeat and he rolled back a little “want to shower or I can summon you some breakfast?”

“No. I better go.” Alec replied kindly “thank you though.” He kissed him quickly.

Magnus watched as Alec hopped around retrieving his clothes and dressing quickly. Magnus got up and put on a silk robe while Alec buckled his boots.

He walked him to the door and then ruffled his post-sex hair into a more suitable style for the public eye.

“I’ll call you tomorrow? Maybe we can get dinner some night this week?” Alec asked.

“I’d love that, Alexander.” Magnus smiled and he reached up and pecked Alec goodbye. 

“Have a good day.” Alec said as Magnus opened the door. 

“You too. Bye, darling.” Magnus hesitated then kissed Alec goodbye once more. When Alec finally pulled away Magnus was a little light headed and his lips swollen.

“Bye.” 

He closed the door and walked back to the kitchen to make some more coffee with a large smile on his face.


End file.
